• livinyo

2020 recapped: bushfires, flooding, rona, emotions

Updated: Dec 10, 2021

alas, the month of September has begun. we're actually about halfway into it, the pace at which time is moving is kind of scary. i mean, it was only January a minute ago, Australia was experiencing raging bushfires, and we witnessed the Aussie community rally around each other in a way that is only synonymous with...being Australian.

then we had the devastating flooding in Queensland.

then... rona.

the only events I recall of 2020, to be frank with you.

i believe that Victoria's response to what is a once-in-a-lifetime event has been commendable so far. our premier has had to blindly navigate through waters never swam in before. our case numbers are going down. so are the daily numbers of deaths. it's very painful, having to stay home with the exception of the four stipulated reasons for leaving the house, and abide by an 8pm (soon-to-be 9pm) curfew. i have also cried more in the past 2 months than the rest of my young life.

i guess that the origins of my abundance of emotions were derived with this unstable situation. one of my pet peeves is uncertainty. although i haven't always known what i'm doing in my life, I've always had a plan. call me miss organised (hype me up), but having a plan makes me feel safe and in control of my life. miss rona really shook up my foundations, and it instilled inordinately high feelings of anxiety and stress in me.

rather than express these emotions in a normal way, like... talk about them, or even acknowledge their very existence, i resorted to stifling them, deep down into the nooks and crannys of whatever lonely spaces existed in my brain. there they grew, and manifested into the ugly creatures that rose and continued to haunt the very spaces they originated. this was my mistake.

it made me feel very depressed and soon resulted in me breaking down, feeling overburdened by the contents buzzing loose in my head.

so, kids - please don't do what i did. you are not a burden to your friends, your family, your loved ones in reaching out for help. assistance. a shoulder to lean on. an ear to vent to. there is someone out there for everyone. you are loved. you are worthy of love and attention. your call for help is not a call for attention. it is worthy and valid.

here's to a better remainder of 2020 - for the love of everything good in the world, let's hope that this year produces good things for the world, good things for us and good things for the people we love.


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